5 Things You Didnt Know About Power - When I Grow Up

5 Things You Didnt Know About Power - When I Grow Up 5. With great power comes great responsibility I forget if this was Yoga or Superman, but I know that my (adorably) nerdy pre-husband will be proud that Im bringing this up! If youre a comic book/sci fi ner-um, affictionado, then this wont come under 5 Things You Dont Know. But look deeper and see the converse effect: With disempowerment comes a sense of not needing to be responsible. If you feel like something is beyond your control, theres no responsibility for you to change it. It seems like a silly example, but I automatically think about picking at my nails. Ive been wanting to stop for years (and no more so than when I got my gorgeous engagement ring), but it hasnt happened. My fingers always wander to the fingers on my other hand. When someone asks why I do that, or why I havent stopped already, I say I cant help it. As if its someone other than me picking at my nails! Oh! And I think the quote is from Spiderman. Or Batman? No, I think its Spiderman. Either way, its one of those guys. 4. You take away someones power by assuming what is right for them. When we tell someone our problems, arent we subconsciously (or consciously?) asking them to solve it for us? Well, in doing so you take away their ability to assume responsibility for it. Youre disempowering them, you disempowerer you! Instead of giving them answers, tell them what you see. If you think its not what they want to hear, think of this: not showing them the truth will just make them think you accept their bad behavior. 3. There are two ways to deal with a problem: find a solution or get rid of the problem Whats easier? Getting rid of the problem. Whats more powerful? Finding a solution. I think Im going to tattoo this on my face. And then show it to my girlfriends who are getting crapped on by the same (type of) guys over and over again. 2.Theres always a reward for allowing ourselves to be disempowered. Understand your reward. It seems amazing that there could be a reward for negative behavior, but that there is. Pretty insane when you start thinking about what those rewards are. When I think about the rewards for picking at my nails, I think of..hmmmm, is there a reward? Anything that pops into my head is not a good one. Then why am I doing it? 1. Power is perception. It doesnt really exist. Did you just get the chills like I did when I first heard that? If not, stop and read it again. OK, if you didnt get it now then here it is bolded and in all caps: POWER DOESNT EXIST! If you tell yourself I cant make a living being an actress or I cant ever be an optimist or I cant find time to paint then all youre doing is taking power away from yourself. The way to bring it back is to turn it on its head. Make the cant into will: I will make a living being an actress; I will be an optimist; I will find time to paint and then ask how? Just saying it isnt enough you need to flesh out a plan to get you there*. *insert shameless plug for my coaching services here P.S. Its Spiderman: